NFL football is inching closer and closer. This means that it’s time to budget out your bankroll for the upcoming season. Are you the type that starts the season with a set amount of money as your bankroll, or do you prefer to user smaller chunks of money each week throughout the fall? Either way, it actually helps to have some sort of plan, especially in these tough economic times. Therefore, the problem of finding money to fund your NFL betting habit rears its ugly head, often coming into conflict with other *less* important things that require your monetary attention in life :p). The following is NFL-betting.com’s serious and not-so-serious list of ways to fund your NFL football betting bankroll. Please don’t try the not so serious methods at home, unless you want to get in trouble with the Missus and the rest of the family. Serious Ways to Fund Your Bankroll
- “Casino Card Shark” – This is actually a half way decent way to get some extra cash for the football season: just go to a casino, online of offline, and use whatever winnings you can acquire as your bankroll. If you’re a blackjack ace, or a mad crazy baccarat player, make your money the old fashioned way: gamble it. What happens if I lose the money I was trying use as a means to build up my bankroll? Well, you’re Sh*t Out Of Luck. Time to play lotto, Skippy, and hope your numbers come in.
- Sell Stock, Everyone Else Is – The economic downturn has left everyone with their…well…nothing 🙂 in their hands. Your 401K is worthless, and Junior’s college fund couldn’t even get him through the doors at DeVry. Maybe it’s time to get out of the stock market and use the money for more productive activities, like the 2009 NFL season. If your securities are becoming insecurities, some wise plays could actually leave you better off by the time this year’s Super Bowl comes along.
- Recycle Beer Cans for their Deposit Money – If you’ve been drinking lots of beer this year, or have an affinity for Mountain Dew a la Can, don’t forget that you can often recycle your aluminum cans for money. In many states, one can equals 5 cents. Now, this may not sound like much, but if you and the boys are healthy beer guzzlers, a few six packs now and then will begin to pile up. Chances are, you may have $200 worth of beer and/or soda cans in the basement, just screaming for attention. Lineup at the Supermarket or Recycling center and contribute to a greener Earth: recycle your cans for NFL betting cash. Sure, you may have to fight off a few bums who monopolize the can recycling machines, but in the end, it will be worth it.
- Sell your Kid’s Car, they’ll probably wreck it anyway – Did you have a car in High School or College when *you* were growing up? Probably Not. So why should your bratty apathetic teenager get a car? We think you should, umm, take it out for a spin one day and leave it a Joe’s Used Car Lot for whatever money you can muster as resale value. Then, with a few thousand in hand, you’ll be ready to bet on the NFL in style, while your ungrateful kid can get a job washing dishes and save up for a car the old fashioned way.
- Pimp Yourself Out – Ever thought of working Bachelorette Parties as the Fuller Brush salesman, or think you can get it up for older ladies who just got out of their marriage and are in need of some physical attention? Why not Pimp yourself out for some much needed NFL betting cash? It’s relatively easy money, especially if your clients don’t mind the fact that your beer belly wobbles up and down while you’re stripping off your vinyl shirt and pants. Sure, it’s a little degrading, but you just gotta have money for your favorite team, right? 🙂 It’s time to man up and do it the old fashioned way: sell your body for cash.
- Sell all of your wife’s furniture at at Tag Sale – Did your in-laws bestow your wife with mahogany desks, leather couches, and antique chairs? If so, maybe it’s time to modernize and get some much needed indoor plastic lawn chairs and a cheap pool table. We recommend you send the wife out shopping for the afternoon, while you stage a shotgun sale of all her furniture. Then, use the proceeds to fund your NFL bankroll, and well, an attorney for your impending divorce.
- Place an Excise Tax on your Kid’s Lemonade Stand – Does Junior have an enterprising Lemonade stand setup outside, ready to quench the dry throats of Summertime passers-by? If so, we suggest you tax him for using your yard as a place of business. Typically, jerk parents charge 10% override on their kid’s gross profits, so it stands to reason that even a slightly busy lemonade stand could bring in a couple hundred extra dollars in revenues for the NFL. Introduce your kid to the realities in life: there are only two certain things, and that’s death and taxes.